`


THERE IS NO GOD EXCEPT ALLAH
read:
MALAYSIA Tanah Tumpah Darahku

LOVE MALAYSIA!!!


 


Thursday, October 19, 2017

Seeds of authoritarianism planted at home



I've been thinking about how parents are different from authoritarian figures, in various forms of official representation, and how authoritarians often draw their role as commander-in-chief parallel to being good parents.
I was once asked to show up for a disciplinary hearing for "misconduct" when I was a student in Universiti Teknologi Mara (UiTM). My alleged crime? Organising student protests against rigged campus elections.
In that hearing, which lasted about two hours, I was confronted by four faculty officials, the dean among them. In that amount of time, which consisted of non-stop nagging about my misplaced desire for a true democracy, I distinctly remember the countless times they referred to themselves as my "second parents", the parents that could, should, and would "look after me" while my real parents are not around in school to police my behaviour.
I remember feeling so disgusted by the comparison. How dare these people claim such a responsibility that they nowhere near ever provided, not to mention the way they talked to me like a five-year-old child.
Every time I tried to speak, they would interrupt just to tell me how wrong I was for going against a corrupt establishment because if it wasn't for them, I wouldn't have been there to get an education.
They even asked me if I was against Umno. Before I could answer that, I was interrupted again and asked how I could be against the hands that fed me.
My "crime" was so serious I was considered "derhaka" (disobedient), like how a child would be disobedient to his or her parents.


I was expected to give thanks (for a god-given right, for god's sake), not to "create trouble". It was like being expected to thank your would-be murderer for not killing you, because apparently your right to live is under someone else's purview, not your own.
All five years in UiTM, I had to put up with the vice chancellor calling himself "ayahanda" (father), and whose threats towards students who were critical and calling for student autonomy always made us fear for our status in the university.
That horrendous hearing was literally a hearing for me, with only them talking and with none of them even listening to what I had to say. It was just me getting my ears burned from all the authoritarian mumbo-jumbo.
But one question remains with me to this day, what makes being a parent so akin to being authoritarian, so much so that nobody questions the limits or boundaries of parental authority? And when authoritarians literally call themselves our parents and say they are acting in our best interests "like how parents would", why do we accept this so unconditionally?
Origins of authoritarianism
For most of us, our first experience of authority is in the form of our parents.
At least for the first 10 years of our lives, if we were not orphaned by unfortunate circumstances, we would almost always be on the receiving end of direct instructions and guidance.
The logic behind this is that children, being newly born and unaccustomed to the ways of the world, need to be taught basic human decency and conduct.
Before they are given all the information they need to make informed decisions, someone else needs to make the decisions for them.
Children often don't get to choose what kind of clothes to wear, which schools they go to, what rules they must follow, nor do they have the option to choose and refuse treatment for a medical condition.


They don't get to make these decisions because even though it is their life to live, it is the parents who provide the means for them to enjoy these experiences until they are able to provide for themselves, for better or worse.
I understand this logic. And to some extent, I do agree. But what is wrong with this logic is when there seems to be no sunset clause to how much or how long parents can exercise their absolute power over the children under their care.
There are two important things that we are not doing here. First, we do not identify the conditions with which power is morally exercised and therefore, obedience is justified or required. Secondly, we do not provide limits, check and balances, and even socio-political boundaries, which renders power to compel obedience almost always absolute.
The fact that this is not happening is a cause for outright horror. Have we not heard the saying, absolute power corrupts absolutely?
Disguised as love
Parents tend to defend themselves with the language of love and care to justify actions that can be harmful.
Disguised as love, authority has been abused to justify the beating of children, psychological manipulation, guilt-tripping and emotional blackmail.
Extend this to the context of any other authoritarian environments, such as an undemocratic school, and autonomy is not only denied and trampled, it is killed.
How can such environment be healthy for critical and innovative minds that are so crucial for progress? The relationship between the tyrants and the oppressed becomes so toxic, it justifies state violence and political persecutions.
When we start punishing autonomy in children, we escalate to punishing autonomy in adults. Already we see many journalists and intellectuals arrested and jailed for exercising freedom of thought and conscience.
And to think that it all begins in the home, in our relationships within the family, it is indeed pretty scary how insidious and invisible the harm of authoritarianism can be.

MARYAM LEE is a writer with a chronic tendency of getting into trouble. What she lacks in spelling when writing in English is made up for with her many writings in Bahasa Malaysia. She believes in conversations as the most valuable yet underrated cause of social change. She wants people to recognise silences and give them a voice, as she tries to bring people together through words.- Mkini

No comments:

Post a Comment

Note: Only a member of this blog may post a comment.